Well, college has started once again and, boy, do I feel like I have wasted a lot of time. I guess "wasted" isn't the best word. More like "used unwisely". I don't want to grow up, but it had to happen sometime. I would always hear my elders saying, "I wish had done this... I wish I had done that," but I never really understood the importance of what they were trying to teach me until now-- until it was just about too late.
I don't want to grow up.
I am now living about a twenty minute bike ride away from campus, which isn't so fun to take when it is pouring outside (I learned the hard way yesterday). The militia of freshmen swarms the campus and I feel like a dot on a white piece of paper.
I don't want to grow up.
It's hard because life is evidently a choice that I make. Every second of it is up to me whether to do something exciting, to hang out, to play guitar, to read, to draw, to be bored, etc.
I've always been used to it being done for me.
I don't want to grow up.
When I was in kindergarten, it was so much joy and so much easier. I would make a piece of junk out of clay and finger paint, which was then a beautiful masterpiece that even DaVinci could keep up with, and my mom would keep it forever. I would go to lunch, drink my semi-warm milk, jump off as much crap as possible, because for those few seconds I was flying, and go to bed early without anybody making fun of me. Never realizing where I would go, how would get there, or how mentally unstable I would be when I got there. I would ride my bike until I couldn't breathe, build a tree house, save the world, and defeat evil all in one day.
I don't want to grow up.
Shalom.
2 comments:
since im stalking you....i realized i need to leave messages on this:) haha not really. dude ry..ahhh i almost made a weird/impulsive decision today and i want to call you and tell you about it..haha BUT i cant. sooo hopefully ill somehow talk to you soon. so just know i got a story for ya. but anyways, amen to not wanting to grow up..i totally agree! its so hard!
i really dont have much to say, just sayin HI! see ya
i know what you mean...well as much as a freshman learning some things the hard way and not wanting to grow up can. by the way, i don't think you'll ever totally grow up- in the ways that you need to, sure- but in the ways that god would rather have us young i'd say yo're hanging in there pretty well. thanks for always being awesome : )!
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