Get away from the pain by sleeping dreams...

Now listening to: Get Lifted by John Legend

My computer is temporarily unavailable, so I haven't taken the time to right blogs. I should've though, cuz I've been thinking about a bunch of stuff. Guess what! I'm graduating in December 2005! That's so unexpected... I gots no idea what I'm going to do... I've got all this growing up to do... It's funny... You're supposed to be grown up in college, yet it seems like highschool a lot of the time.
I can't be an RA, so I don't know where I'm living... I just don't know a lot right now...
I was watching a sappy, romantic movie called, "Serendipity," which I like a lot, but it definitely throws out the idea that LOVE IS PATIENT- it waits for the right time. It's so tempting to make the present time the right time, but that's a big no no... Man, I was almost crying tonight when I was hanging out with Audrey. The reason was because I had been hurt really bad in the past by a "girlfriend" and I will never get that part of my heart back. My logical thoughts and my romantic feelings constantly contradict each other-- "Don't kiss her; you know your limits"... "Kiss her; it's the perfect moment; it's just a kiss." She is my sister in Christ, so I must help her to honor God more. Distraction.
I thought I knew how to handle these things, but now I realize I got no idea whatsoever.
ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
It's so hard to start right, because that usually means starting from scratch also.

"We're just ordinary people
We don't know which way to go.
We're just ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow
Take it slow..."

Love. I talk way too much about it... but I don't care, because God is love... and I love God.
Love. I walk away from it too much... but I don't care, because I'm comfortable...
HOLD UP.
I'm wearing this bracelet that says, "Fight hunger and homelessness".
I'm I fighting it?? What ever happened to community, that word that is over-used and under-appreciated. Kids are denied of education. Families are denied of food. Mothers are denied of basic pregnancy care. Nations are denied protection. Thousands are denied a shelter to live in. MILLIONS ARE DENIED LOVE FROM THEIR FELLOW MAN.
Why? So you can wear designer jeans and eat fillet mignon??? STOP IT!!!!
I make myself sick.
But what can we do??? What difference can I make??
It's not about YOU! It's about God, foremost, then it's about US.
MILLIONS ARE ALWAYS GIVEN LOVE.
What I believe is defined by what I do... If you're not living it, You Don't Believe it!!!
Shalom.